You Know You're Obsessed With Bones When
by MajorSamanthaCarter
Summary: uh, the title is fairy self-explanatory. HMF and I will be co-writing this...so yeah. pls r&r - go on, you know you want to!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey peoples! This is a list of… well, the title is fairly self-explanatory. Me and Holly Marie Fowl ****(sorry, bad grammar) will be co-writing this fic (it was her idea, after all!)- I think we're doing one chapter each. This one is mine (duh.) [i.e. MajorSamanthaCarter- MSC for short.]. Please leave a review at the end, all suggestions and funny stories are welcome! **

**: D MSC**

*********

**You know you're obsessed with Bones when…**

-You and your friends all have Bones nicknames for each other, and name any people they don't really like after the victims (e.g. Mr Ed.)

-You also name inanimate objects after Bones characters (my friends have two key-ring teddy bears called Russ and Ripley, and I named a toy we found at a holiday house Charlie-Parker [see Stargate for the 'Charlie' part]. My friend and I had to leave it there, but we attached a note saying 'My name is Charlie-Parker. Ask me how I can solve this case.' (From man in the cell, I think… with Howard Epps. *shudders*))

-The day after the latest Bones episode, the first thing you do when you get to school is discuss it, in detail, from beginning to end.

-You/your friends can name EVERY SINGLE Bones episode, as well as being able to tell you what happened in it and a quote. This includes episodes that haven't been shown on TV yet. [Yes, my friends _can_ actually do that!]

-You all get really excited in the days leading up to the next Bones episode (all 6 of them- days, I mean!)

-You ask all your teachers whether or not they watch Bones; if the answer is yes, they are immediately elevated to 'favourite teacher' status. If they say no, you tell them that they should watch it, and then give them channel, date and time.

-You giggle every time a certain teacher walks by because he looks suspiciously like Hodgins, and then ask him whether he watches Bones.

-You can quote at least 2 funny sayings from every character, and (more often than not) one from every episode.

-You screamed out loud, then started jumping up and down while clapping your hands and giggling uncontrollably at 'The Kiss' in Santa in the Slush.

-You get really excited every time Bones and Booth have a 'shippy moment'.

-Then you learn said moment off by heart so you can quote it to friends and non-believers

-You cried when Zack left, and even now you still get sniffles over it.

-You also cried when Booth sort-of died.

-Every Monday night (which is when Bones is on, here in the land of Oz) you have to tape Bones because your parents won't let you stay up that late, and then get up at 6:00 the next morning so you can watch it before school.

-You own seasons 1 & 2 on DVD, and will buy season 3 the day it comes out.

-You have seen every episode (that you have on DVD) at least twice.

-You have a little book in which you write funny/shippy quotes from Bones.

-You judge all other couples using Brennan/Booth

-You and your friends have a 'hatred list' consisting of all the people who have gone out with Bones or Booth (on the basis that they are meant to be together and everyone else should just butt out).

-you and your friends watched an ENTIRE season and a bit in ONE NIGHT [back-to-back episodes all the way… But I wasn't actually there! I had something on… that was depressing. :( ]

-you write fanfiction obsessively, most of which involves Booth and Brennan getting together, or Angela and Hodgins… GAH! I can't believe they broke up! :(

-you get in trouble from your teachers because you talk about Bones during class

**Woo! That is all I think of for the moment… hang tight for HMF's chapter, up next on FF! And don't forget to review…!**

**:D MSC**


	2. Chapter 2

Me, aka, Holly Marie Fowl: Hey, here's my chapter of "You know you're obsessed with Bones when. . . ."

Athena: Holly, aren't you forgetting something?

Me: Why, my poor underpaid Muse, no I am not.

Athena: Yes, you are. And just remember that YOU'RE the one paying me.

Me: I don't have that big an allowance. Sorry.

Athena: What I'm trying to say is-

Me: If you have any stories or quotes to contribute, please contribute!

Athena: No. I meant-

Me: Shut up, Athena.

Athena: Do you honestly think you own it?

Me: Do I even need a disclaimer for this? I'm just telling you how obsessed you are with this show. It's not like I'm saying "oh, I own this," because I don't.

Athena: Yes! Ha!

Me: Crap.

**You know you're obsessed with Bones when. . . . .**

You have a nightmare about Gormagon murdering one of your teachers. (um, true story. . . . .Don't ask. *shivers*)

You have nightmares about him eating YOU.

You make a top ten villains list, and Gormagon, Howard Epps, and the Gravedigger are all on it.

You squeal at the top of your lungs when you hear the rumor about the season four finale. (**********CENSORED********** [for spoilers, duh! If you want to find out about said spoilers, simply review…])

If you didn't hear the rumor before reading the above one, you just screamed and started jumping around the room.

You don't understand why your parents don't believe you when you tell them the rumor.

You make your parents watch it. (Except in my case, where it was recorded on TiVo, and my parents said it's a good show, so I watched. And loved it.)

You still remember what the first episode you ever watched was was. ("Priest in the Churchyard.")

You make all your friends watch it and don't understand why some of them don't like it. (*glares at one of my friends*)

/bones is your homepage.

The only one of your friends who DOESN'T watch Bones knows most of the characters names.

You absolutely LOVE the song 'Hot Blooded'.

Stories that have happened to me:

I was talking to one of my teachers today, and it turns out that they've seen an episode of Bones. (The He in the She) I told her about the rumor of the fourth season, and she smiles and says "I've only seen one episode and I can already tell that that should happen."

* * *

My best friend had seen a commercial for a new episode of Bones. This was last year. Anyway, as I was taking a drink, she told me. . .and I started choking on the water and ended up spitting it out. I was laughing so hard. (it was right before "the man in the mud.")

**End Notes:**

Me: I think that's about it. Like I said, if you have any stories or any "you know you're obsessed" ideas, review! Next up is MSC's chapter!

Athena: Yup! I'll give you an e-truffle if you review!

Me: No you won't. MSC is answering the reviews.

Athena: Oh.

~HMF and her not-so-smart Muse

Athena: HEY!

Me: Fine.

~HMF and her Muse

Athena: What, not even saying faithful anymore?

Me: Grr. You are sooooo picky. Do you want me to get out the buzz baton?

~HMF and her _faithful_ Muse.

(Me: There, Athena, are you happy now? Athena: Yes.)

**MSC**: hey, where's my disclaimer??

Nah, jokes… I just wanted to apologise!! It's my fault this has taken so long to put up, I was, uh, distracted…. Oh, and also a big SORRY(!) to all the people whose reviews I didn't reply to. I feel really bad, cos I usually do, so just… thankyou for reviewing! And if you review again, I PROMISE I will reply… :) :) :P cya ppls!

:D MSC


End file.
